Traits of autism

On Quora, I keep getting asked about traits of autism. I want to start accumulating answers here, so I don't have to keep answering the same question  over and over

• Poor prosody is usually the thing I notice first. This is the melody of speech. The person speaks in a monotone, often nasal, sometimes too high (Of course, this is for those who have speech.  Many autistic people do not)
• Speaking at great length, so that you can't get a word in edgewise, typically in an extremely boring topic, is another clue — obsession with obscure trivia. A good conversation is like a volleyball game. The ball goes back and forth. Alternatively, the person may never speak at all
• Avoiding eye contact is another. The person may not appreciate that it's rude to be looking at the computer or cell phone during a conversation.
• Hyper or hypo sensitivities to sensory stimuli will be frequent, especially sensitivity to loud noises or certain food tastes. Many will be touch adverse and not like physical affection — or alternatively will be overly huggy and not notice that the person isn't enjoying being crushed.
• Rigidity in the face of changes in routine or plans is another typical symptom.
• The person will typically be mystified as to why no one likes them
• repetitive movements, or extreme attachment to ritual.  
• extreme anxiety in the face of transitions or new situations.

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My experiences of autism

I am told that neurotypicals are constantly engaging in subliminal interchange of small movements of the muscles around the eyes. When they are with others, exchanging these movements, it’s a kind of telepathy. They know what others are feeling all the time. They feel part of the group.

People with Aspergers are missing that. We can’t do it. That’s a big part of our disability.

Even when I’m with others, I feel alone. I don’t feel connected. I want to feel connected the way neurotypicals do. I can’t.

Also, I have auditory sensitivities and other sensory integration problems. I can’t be in a crowded, noisy bar. I can’t be surrounded by large screen TVs with sports images. I can’t go in there. I have to leave. I miss out on social groups.

In group conversations, I cannot participate. I don’t know when it’s my turn. It’s like when I was a child and kids would jump rope “double Dutch,” in other words there were two ropes at once. I just didn’t feel like I could even attempt that.

Even in a one-on-one conversation, often the speaker changes subjects faster than I can respond to a single topic. Listening to such a speaker just feels like being electrocuted. I sit there, paralyzed, and can’t say anything.

I also often don’t know my feelings until several days later. I can’t explain in a timely fashion what is going on with me.

I’m not sure if this is Asperger’s or not, but I find that a lot of people start issuing me instructions. I say something and they give me instructions about how to do it. I just want them to listen and be my friend. I don’t want a bunch of random people issuing me instructions. I’m already busy enough without being sent hither and yon with new missions. This might be a problem for neurotypicals as well.

I want to have friends. I want to have emotional intimacy. It doesn’t work.

See Also

https://qr.ae/TWrhu5


Plus 
http://annalisse-mayer.blogspot.com/2019/02/features-of-autism.html

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Very early signs of autism

My elder son definitely showed signs of autism from birth, but I failed to appreciate their significance. These were the signs that I see in retrospect

• arched away from us when crying (neurotypicals will cuddle up)
• punched and kicked us when lying in bed next to us, rather than cuddling up
• crying to be put down (neurotypicals will cry to be picked up)
• by six weeks preferring to be carried facing outwards
• later, when learning to speak, invented his own language and expected us to learn it
• again, later, hysteria over changes of routine, including guests in the house

see https://www.quora.com/What-age-do-signs-of-autism-begin-to-show/answer/Annalisse-Mayer